See the thing is, it happened this morning at about 10am. Hence why I remember it as clear as a bell. After he left, I had to jump on.
We're pretty quick-witted us bunch, constantly jibing/hacking on each other. If you were "new" to this circle of mates and partners, you'd honestly think we hated each other
Happens when everyone has worked in hospitality for more than 10 years.
Them: "You're not serving me because you think I'm too drunk???"
Us: "I'm not serving you because I think you're a C*CKHEAD!!!"
(not bad from a girl who's 5ft tall and all vitriol)
Them: "So, is dessert going to be you?"
Us: "Yes sir... except that I'd eat you alive for breakfast. I'm not a fan of small weiners first thing in the morning though."
Boss: "Right. I want to go home. Gavin, any ideas how to clear out the pub?"
Me: "Of course. I have Metallica's "Ride the Lightning" in the car."
Boss: "Terrific. Chuck it in the CD player so they can appreciate the classics."
Very Drunk 50yo Hen: "Oi! Babe! You married yet? My friend thinks you're cute."
Me: "Actually no. Australia doesn't support gay marriages."
(one way to make a hen's night leave you alone is to "swap sexualities" where convenient)
Them: "How much will it cost for a Corona with two wedges of lime?"
Us: "Your dignity and my respect for you."
(pointing to our Wood-Fired pizza oven, with the sign that says "Wood Fired Pizza" above it)
Them: "Do you do wood-fired pizzas?"
Me: "Not all the time. We also do cremations on weekdays."
Although... some comments from those new in hospitality make me cringe....
Them: "What's this bottle of red like?"
Us: "Warm"
Us: "What? Your coffee is too bitter? Sorry about that ma'am, I only make them... I don't drink the stuff" (it's like having a marriage counsellor who's single!)
"Oh sh*t! I'm really sorry!"
((after dropping a hot coffee into my lap... then proceeds to get a tea towel and pounds it into my crotch as if she were violently dabbing up a stain from the carpet. Owwww)
I used to get away with murder in hospitality. It's nowhere near as exciting in I.T. and I kind of miss it.
We're pretty quick-witted us bunch, constantly jibing/hacking on each other. If you were "new" to this circle of mates and partners, you'd honestly think we hated each other
Happens when everyone has worked in hospitality for more than 10 years.Them: "You're not serving me because you think I'm too drunk???"
Us: "I'm not serving you because I think you're a C*CKHEAD!!!"
(not bad from a girl who's 5ft tall and all vitriol)
Them: "So, is dessert going to be you?"
Us: "Yes sir... except that I'd eat you alive for breakfast. I'm not a fan of small weiners first thing in the morning though."
Boss: "Right. I want to go home. Gavin, any ideas how to clear out the pub?"
Me: "Of course. I have Metallica's "Ride the Lightning" in the car."
Boss: "Terrific. Chuck it in the CD player so they can appreciate the classics."
Very Drunk 50yo Hen: "Oi! Babe! You married yet? My friend thinks you're cute."
Me: "Actually no. Australia doesn't support gay marriages."
(one way to make a hen's night leave you alone is to "swap sexualities" where convenient)
Them: "How much will it cost for a Corona with two wedges of lime?"
Us: "Your dignity and my respect for you."
(pointing to our Wood-Fired pizza oven, with the sign that says "Wood Fired Pizza" above it)
Them: "Do you do wood-fired pizzas?"
Me: "Not all the time. We also do cremations on weekdays."
Although... some comments from those new in hospitality make me cringe....
Them: "What's this bottle of red like?"
Us: "Warm"
Us: "What? Your coffee is too bitter? Sorry about that ma'am, I only make them... I don't drink the stuff" (it's like having a marriage counsellor who's single!)
"Oh sh*t! I'm really sorry!"
((after dropping a hot coffee into my lap... then proceeds to get a tea towel and pounds it into my crotch as if she were violently dabbing up a stain from the carpet. Owwww)
I used to get away with murder in hospitality. It's nowhere near as exciting in I.T. and I kind of miss it.
